| The Frank Nevarez Show |
| Do the Math: the Colts Lose |
| by Frank Nevarez |
| The ‘ol armchair mathematician is back at work again. With calculator in hand I took it upon myself to take a hard look at the contest between Indianapolis and San Diego. Read on and be amazed. Numbers don’t lie. |
Let’s throw an early point to Indy. They’re playing at home, they’re the league’s darling and they’re on their 13-game winning streak. Indy 1, SD 0.
Indy does not score on its first series. Usually they strike quickly and scare the bejesus out of an opponent. San Diego survives Test #1. Indy 1, SD 1.
In the first quarter Keenan McCardell scores on a 29-yard pass from Drew Brees. SD 2, Indy 1.
With a little over eight minutes left in the first quarter Peyton Manning throws an interception, but the Colts get the ball back when the Chargers fumble the ball away as they try to run back the INT. The plays offset each other. No points for anyone.
However, on the next series Manning is sacked and then he is forced to scramble for a first down – which he doesn’t make. Peyton’s scrambling is uncoordinated and funny-looking. Think of Jim Carrey on ‘roids. SD 3, Indy 1.
Brees completes 49-yard pass, LaDainian Tomlinson gets a 12-yard run and Nate Kaeding hits a 36-yard field goal. Chargers up 10-0. SD 4, Indy 1.
In the second quarter it looks like the Colts are finally going to put it together. Edgerrin James, Reggie Wayne and Marvin Harrison all contribute. Even though Manning gets a break when a potential interception is dropped, the Colts are looking Colts-like. Their hurry-up offense even catches the Chargers with 12 men on the field and brings on a penalty. SD 4, Indy 2.
The Colts make it to the red zone, but on the one-yard line they can’t score. A broken fourth down play results in Manning, again, scrambling like a crazy man. Pure comedy. Charlie Chaplain, the Keystone Cops would be proud. SD 5, Indy 2.
San Diego adds another field goal at the end of the first half. They lead 13-0 at the half. SD 6, Indy 2.
In the second half Manning gets sacked by Shawne Merriman, the Chargers get a 17-yard burst from 2nd-year running back Michael Turner and end up with another field goal. The Chargers lead 16-0. SD 7, Indy 2.
Midway through 3rd quarter the Colts put a drive together and pick up a field goal. SD 7, Indy 3.
Brees throws an interception at the Chargers’ 26 yard line. SD 7, Indy 4. Manning throws a 25-yard pass to Harrison and James scores from one yard out. Here comes Indianapolis! San Diego’s lead is now only six points. My scoring has it SD 7, Indy 5.
Dwight Freeney sacks Brees, the ball is knocked loose and recovered by the Colts at the San Diego 4-yard line. SD 7, Indy 6. The Colts score three plays later and lead for the first time 17-16. You will see that my scoring reads SD 7, Indy 7. I know, the actual score is not tied. Hang in there, my mathematical formula is foolproof.
In the fourth quarter big plays from McCardell, Brees and Kaeding contribute to another San Diego field goal. The Chargers take a 19-17 lead. My scoring: SD 8, Indy 7.
The Colts fumble the kick-off. It’s recovered by the Chargers. But Brees will throw an interception two plays later. Offsetting disasters. No points for either team.
The next Colts’ drive starts to roll, but gets bogged down and they’re forced to punt. SD 9, Indy 7.
With a little over two minutes to go the Chargers are lined up at their 17-yard line. They hand off to Michael Turner and he runs for an 83-yard TD. The blocking is perfect and Indy’s Mike Doss misses a last chance shot at bringing him down.
You have to give San Diego two points for a knock-out punch delivered by a fifth-round pick from Northern Illinois. Northern Illinois? Didn’t their basketball team have a Cinderella-like run in the NCAA’s a couple years back? No, that was the SOUTHERN Illinois Salukis. Salukis being a funky breed of dog.
Northern Illinois (NIU) plays in the MAC. The MAC has given us Ben Roethlisberger, Byron Leftwich and Chad Pennington. They’re called the Huskies, a more familiar type of dog. They lost in the MAC championship game to Akron this year.
Well, Michael Turner, formerly of NIU, just captured the two final San Diego points on my scoring system. Final Score: SD 11, Indy 7.
I don’t expect the NFL to adopt my mathematical look at competition. There are plenty of pigskin formulas out there. The Colts’ new number is 13-1. Let’s give them 24 hours to get their heads back together. I think we can “count” on them to be ready come play-off time. Now that the perfect season hype is done let’s hope they can now concentrate on getting to Super Bowl XL (that’s “40” for you non-mathematicians out there).
|
|
